I’m out for dinner with my residents and colleagues. It’s our first in-person party in three years. It feels a little bit illicit to be lounging on the couches of a Couscous Restaurant and chatting. One thing that came up in the conversation was where we all fell in our family constellation. Most of us were either the eldest in… Read More »“Opener of the womb”: The burden and privilege of being the first born
I’m in Labour and Delivery. I have a grand multip with ruptured membranes in labour, so I do not dare to leave the floor. This 41-year-old woman just switched to me after her obstetrician retired. She has had all her previous eleven babies at another hospital and I want to make her feel safe. My vacation starts tomorrow and not… Read More »The other side of Roxham Road
In the past few weeks, I’ve been witness to several crimes or injustices. In one, I was complicit. I will not go into the disturbing tale of the estranged husband who did not inform his wife that her application for landed immigrant status had been accepted; or the man who ended his financial contributions to his family as well as… Read More »Crimes and misdemeanors
I have always hated housework. I often joke (though it’s not really a joke) that I became a doctor in order to have a good excuse not to do it. I’m extremely lucky that, among his many virtues, my husband loves to do housework. His idea of a really good day is to be puttering around the house, creating order… Read More »Dirt, marriage and cataract surgery
As I sat at my kitchen table, coughing while immersed in self-pity and surrounded by snotty tissues, my friend Eva texted me from Labour and Delivery at NYGH in Toronto. She was waiting for her multiparous patient to open fully to the idea of getting her baby out. “Have you read Ted Jablonski’s column this morning? I almost spit up my coffee,… Read More »A profound response
I have previously written about how I slid across the floor and caught a baby just in time. Now I have a confession to make: I once dropped a baby. This was the second month of my rotating internship and I was so excited to be doing my obstetrics rotation at St. Mary’s Hospital in Montreal. I was eager, scared and green… Read More »Perle Feldman drops the baby
Last week, I was on-call in Labour and Delivery. I was working with a first-year family medicine resident. She’s part of the cohort whose entire clerkship took place during the pandemic. McGill made the decision that since the students were not yet physicians, they should be protected from the virus as much as possible. As a result, this resident, like… Read More »In praise of hands
I am a professional nice person. I have the great privilege of getting paid well to do good in the world. I am able to relieve suffering, help people navigate the difficulties of their lives and sometimes even cure diseases. I take pride in doing it well. I take on patients who are marginalized and I think I go the… Read More »My sister: A New Year’s meditation
As I inch towards a peri-retirement, I am grateful for the long-standing flexibility my on-call group has used for many years—to the benefit of practitioners at many different stages in their careers. In a follow up to my last story, I decided to stop taking obstetrics call. I was very touched by the universal support from my on-call group, who… Read More »Report from Burnoutville: Flexibility creates families out of teams
I went to my butchers recently. Our favorite young butcher, Benjamin, looking even more dapper than usual, came up to us with a smile. “I have news,” he said smiling. “Good or bad?” I was apprehensive; worried that he was leaving the store. I really did not want to lose this personable and capable young man from my life. My… Read More »Report from Burnoutville: To Quit or not To Quit